U2

"I saw them way back when, touring that "Boy" album, or whatever, and it was awful", he continues.

I don't really know what to say.  I'm working on a turkey smokie; my second of the night, after having missed dinner to get downtown on time, and am currently boiling in self-pity.

"Holy #$%^, it sounds loud in there!" he exclaims.  The Cambie corridor is echoing with a ghostly mix of U2's music, interspersed with the sounds of 60,000 or so people having the time of their lives as the band wrapped up the first leg of their 360° Tour at a sold-out BC Place on Wednesday. 

"I was just in there", I tell him.  "It was awesome."

He seems a little puzzled as to why I'm hanging out with him, rather than staying at the concert.  I explain:

"I had a photo pass.  I was like, right up front, taking shots.  But we only get to shoot three songs before we're kicked out.  I didn't have a ticket, so I can't check out the rest of the show."

He seems mildly interested.  Until another smokie-starved customer walks up, perhaps using the vendor's umbrella as a reprieve from the driving rain.  He peruses the menu and orders a turkey smokey "well done", then insists on watching Hot Dog Man cook it, just to be sure.

The faint sounds of another U2 mega-hit fill the streets.  It's all hotdog smoke, driving rain, and eerie distant superstardom.  I feel like I've been exiled from Party City to some kind of meat by-product refugee camp.

"F#$% U2", the newcomer grumbles.  "I'm just glad I got here before the Skytrain chaos."

Hotdog man nods.  I'm sure he's gonna be hating all that U2 fan money when all those people come streaming out.

"I was just in there", I tell the newcomer.  "It was awesome."  I feel mildly zombified.

He too, seems a little puzzled as to why I'm hanging out at the hotdog cart, rather than staying in the concert.  I explain the photo pass thing to him, too.

He responds with a disinterested "huh", and continues to supervise his turkey smokie.  My cue to exit.

Stamping through the rain-soaked streets to my truck, parked in a $20 "event parking" lot, and listening to the fading sounds of U2 emanating from BC Place is a lonely, depressing experience.  I hope I got some good shots.

80 minutes earlier:

Before being allowed into BC Place, the small army of photographers was given precise instructions about where and where not to stand, so we wouldn't get in the way, or get injured by the bridges.  Wow.  Every aspect of this production is micro-managed to the ultimate fine detail.  As we were led to the floor, I think my heart stopped a little as I emerged onto the floor to see the upper and lower bowls of the building doing "the wave". I've seen some pretty big shows before, but never from this perspective.  Stunning.

After an hour-long intermission between openers Black Eyed Peas, the subdued house music was amplified significantly enough for the 57,000 or so in attendance to realize something was happening.  David Bowie's "Space Oddity" was accompanied by some countdown clock-work animation on the massive, 30 foot by 200 foot (or so) circular 360 degree video screen on the 164-foot tower that is the spectacle of U2's stage. 

"Ground control to Major Tom,
Commencing countdown, engines on...."

Photo credit: Luka Krstulović

I gotta tell ya, I was electrified.  As far as concerts, particularly photographing concerts go, it doesn't get much bigger than this. 

"Check ignition and may God's love be with you"

As far as stages go, this is historic: double the size of the Rolling Stones' stage from the "A Bigger Bang" tour.  The 390-ton, $35 million behemoth construct sits like a massive, four-legged spider, with camera operators and lighting crews perched on the "legs". 

To put this into perspective:

Closer up, you can see the operators:

The stage itself is connected by bridges to a circular runway.  Fans in the inner ring are a few feet away from the band as they cross the bridges...which ALSO move around. 

"This is major Tom to ground control, I'm stepping through the door
And I'm floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today"

The stage itself may be more of a spectacle than the band, and has drawn some heavy criticism from environmentalist groups.  Due to the magnitude of the stage, the tour requires that three separate stages travel the country, set up in advance in each city.  This requires 120 trucks, 137 touring production crew, and over 120 hired locals.  Daily cost of the production: $750,000.

"Here am I floatin' 'round my tin can far above the world
Planet Earth is blue and there's nothing I can do"

According to Carbonfootprint.com, the combined emissions of this tour will amount to 65,000 tons.  Let's put that into perspective:

-enough to fly the band 34.125 million miles to Mars and back on their private jet

-equal to the amount of carbon produced by 6,500 British people in a year.

-the equivalent of leaving a light bulb on for 159,000 years

-To offset this year’s carbon emissions, U2 would need to plant 20,118 trees.

"Can you hear me, major Tom?"

Imagine if everybody at BC Place on Wednesday planted a tree to show their support for the band, and to silence all the whiners out there who are bitching about their carbon footprint?  U2 could save the world with a few tours!

Considering they have a knack for outdoing themselves on every tour, you can only imagine what's next.  U2 has signed a 12-year deal with Live Nation, so the odds are pretty good that they'll be coming back soon, with something even more outrageous and fantastic.  I will be sure to get tickets well in advance next time.  I wonder what Bill Gates (who celebrated his birthday at the concert with U2 leading the crowd in singing "Happy Birthday") paid for his? 

As "Space Oddity" faded, and the lights went down, the stage lit up like some massive Awesomebot from the Transformers movies, as Larry Mullen, Jr. appeared at the drums and began to play "Breathe", as Edge, Adam, and finally, Bono appeared onstage.  Everything about this felt so incredibly epic that it was hard not to stand and stare, but I had three songs to get some shots.  Better get busy!

In his first address to the crowd, Bono inexplicably chose to recite what he had apparently Googled about our fair city:

"VANCOUVER!!!  SKYTRAIN!!  MILLENIUM LINE!  EXPO LINE!"

Weird.

After a few other songs from the new album that I didn't know ("Get On Your Boots", and "Magnificent"), I realized in horror that my memory card was full, and I'd forgotten my other memory cards in my other camera bag. 

And wouldn't you know it, no sooner than my card was full, Bono, Edge, and Adam Clayton appeared on the bridge to my right, then walked out and stood right in front of me.  Like five feet away.  I was scrambling through my shots, deleting the crap ones, taking a shot or two, then repeat, click, delete, click, delete.  Unfortunately, I ran out of time.  Sure enough, they started into "Mysterious Ways", which I would have loved to see, but alas...

As we were escorted out of the press pit, under the bridge where Edge was playing, I wanted to call out to him: "EDGE!  SAVE ME!  GET BONO!  HELP!  I WANNA STAY!  EDGE!  NOOOOO!!!!!!"

But I didn't.  I went outside and stood in the rain and tried to listen.  The concrete was too thick, and it was raining too hard.  I felt like Major Tom drifting off into space.  Good time to go find a hot dog.

ps:

Dear Bono:

Next time you come to Vancouver, here are a few other awesome things to say:

"ROBERTO LUONGO!"

"HOV LANE!"

"CAROLE JAMES!"

"HOLLOW TREE!"

"MR. TUBE STEAK!"

"SUSPENSION BRIDGE"

"GROUSE GRIND!"

"HEDY FRY!"

'SHON T !"

And come on my birthday, that would rule, k thx bye!